Books & Java

Everything I Never Told You

by Celeste Ng

 

Synopsis:

Lydia is dead. But they don’t know this yet . . . So begins the story of this exquisite debut novel, about a Chinese American family living in 1970s small-town Ohio. Lydia is the favorite child of Marilyn and James Lee; their middle daughter, a girl who inherited her mother’s bright blue eyes and her father’s jet-black hair. Her parents are determined that Lydia will fulfill the dreams they were unable to pursue—in Marilyn’s case that her daughter become a doctor rather than a homemaker, in James’s case that Lydia be popular at school, a girl with a busy social life and the center of every party.

When Lydia’s body is found in the local lake, the delicate balancing act that has been keeping the Lee family together tumbles into chaos, forcing them to confront the long-kept secrets that have been slowly pulling them apart. James, consumed by guilt, sets out on a reckless path that may destroy his marriage. Marilyn, devastated and vengeful, is determined to find a responsible party, no matter what the cost. Lydia’s older brother, Nathan, is certain that the neighborhood bad boy Jack is somehow involved. But it’s the youngest of the family—Hannah—who observes far more than anyone realizes and who may be the only one who knows the truth about what happened.

A profoundly moving story of family, history, and the meaning of home, Everything I Never Told You is both a gripping page-turner and a sensitive family portrait, exploring the divisions between cultures and the rifts within a family, and uncovering the ways in which mothers and daughters, fathers and sons, and husbands and wives struggle, all their lives, to understand one another.

My Review:

I absolutely loved this book. It reminded me of the complex issues of "what if" and "belonging, fitting in" tackled in two movies I saw in the 1990s - Sliding Doors and The Virgin Suicides. This is the story of the Lee family. Marilyn Lee is the beautiful all-American girl who falls in love with Henry Lee, a Chinese immigrant who has struggled his entire life with identity issues and fitting in. Henry has grown up in the U.S. but is raised by his Chinese parents and awkward about both his Chinese heritage and his having to blend in to a very discriminatory and intolerant America of the 1950s. He doesn't know how to blend in but he is smart and determined, so he goes to the best school and graduates top of his class in college. His dream to teach at Harvard (the ultimate American assimilation) remains only a dream as a better "suited" (white) candidate is chosen over him. However, he is content to teach American History at a college where he meets Marilyn. Marilyn is fascinated by his differences and how although he is not like the others he is still brave enough to stand up in front of a class that clears once they see he is Chinese. Marilyn has always been smart and wants to be more than the hopes and dreams of her mother - the Betty Crocker wannabe who teaches home economics at her high school. She hates the notion that just because she is a woman, she should not aspire to pursue science and math fields like physics or medicine. She takes Lee's class as an elective but ends up dropping the class so that she can date Henry. They marry much to the dismay of her mother and so the story begins.

Marilyn and Henry give up a lot of their dreams and settle on being together. Marilyn gets pregnant and Lee is refused for the teaching position at Harvard. Marilyn drops out of college to be a mother. They have two kids - Nath and Lydia. As Nath and Lydia start getting older, Marilyn feels she is not living the life she had wanted and runs away leaving her family behind to pursue her dream of becoming a doctor. After 8 weeks she starts missing her family and then finds that she is pregnant with her third child - Hannah - and decides to once again, give up her dreams and go back home.

The book begins when Lydia is 16 years old and has gone missing - to be found dead at the bottom of the nearby lake. How this comes to happen is the result of dreams not fulfilled and living vicariously through one's children. It is also the result of a family so different by the definition of the times that their fitting-in and assimilating to life as they know it is just uncomfortable and unnatural. There is a great emphasis on the notion that it is important to be liked and accepted regardless of your own love and acceptance of yourself. There is shame and dishonor in being different. So, the story takes us through the evolution of the Lee family and their struggles to become the all-American family in a world that touts "melting-pot" when truly it is a very segregated and intolerant world.

This was such an excellent book. I related to some of the feelings and issues discussed in the book as I too came to the U.S. at an early age (9) and had to assimilate and blend in as an outsider. I did not speak the language and I wasn't blonde and fair skinned. However, my experience was nothing like that of the Lee children as my experience was for the most part positive but I could definitely relate to some of the sentiments.

I would highly recommend this book. Celeste Ng is a brilliant writer and I look forward to reading more of her work.